We are drowning in data. We are living in sensory overload. So, the first challenge for an influencer (or any person, for that matter) is to focus. To build the skill of ignoring the inconsequential and honing in on the valuable.
Having observational focus in a conversation is critical. However, what most people don’t realize is that after that conversation is over, a new battle is waged.
In your conversations with your mark – the person you are wanting to influence, you will detect clues and influential triggers. With every point of leverage you discover, you feel a buzz of accomplishment. You spot one! Then, you see more clues popping up left and right. You’re rocking it!
And then, you will tell yourself the biggest and most common lie that we all have said.
“I’ll remember.” As in, “I’ll remember all of these triggers and leverage points later on when I need them. Who knows when that will be, but I’ll remember.”
You like to talk about yourself. It’s okay. Everyone love to. We’re just wired that way. Besides, you’re a cool person with cool experiences, so why wouldn’t you?
Think about it. You have a microphone pointed at you with a roomful of people staring at you who have been told that you are the person to listen to. So naturally, you think – either consciously or unconsciously – since you have been given this platform and people have come to hear from you, then they must be interested in learning about you. It’s only natural to brush your shoulders off and let the awesomeness of you waft over. It’s a pretty cool feeling.
And so, you open your speech with information about you – why you’re the person talking about this topic and how you got to be the head honcho on stage.
While I have no doubt that your credentials, background, and experiences are very interesting, this isn’t the best way to open your speech. Don’t worry! You will still be able to talk about yourself. That part has its rightful place…. a little later in your speech.
In my training programs on stage and online, I share the 10 most common motivational and influential triggers. These are underlying desires and tendencies that we all have in varying degrees. An influencer’s job is to identify which triggers are more effective for specific people.
After speaking at an event for a law firm with an audience of the firm’s associates, partners, and their C-level executive clients, one of the associates approached me and asked, “When you talked about those triggers, I was
just wondering…are triggers weaknesses?”
Her question revealed a new perspective that I hadn’t considered and helped me realize that this is something that I should clarify in all of my future programs.
So, let’s talk about triggers, baby!
Are they a weakness? Are you exploiting them? Should you feel bad if you know how to identify them and leverage them? Should you be aware of your triggers and build up a defense system around them?
First, let me explain where the triggers originate from.
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